College is Stress on Crack!

24 May 2011

So...what?! Here I sit extremely close to ending my Freshmen year of college, and my professors are not helping me end my year but rather expand the chaos. I have exams in every class or at least some huge project due. Yay, I love college (said sarcastically)! I enjoy college and everything it has to offer but lets be real...the best part of college is the social aspect. Now, yes I am to school for college and a nerd at heart, but I know how to socialize as well and rather enjoy it! But like at the end of every quarter the professors cram everything into the last two maybe, three weeks of class. I going crazy. I go to class from 9am to 4pm almost everyday, and then go to the library to study for the night. I would love to spend one full day not doing anything related to school. Just one day a week where I did not have to worry about ethos, rhetoric, compounds, derivatives, the Vietnam War, or social psychology. Tell if this is too much, and I asking for too much? Are my request, not even demands, but desires to much to ask for? I'm just tired. Tired of doing this every day, week, month. I need a break. I need time away. School has never drained me so much as this year has. It's stress on crack! You just go go go, all the time! Sleeping becomes a luxury. Eating becomes time consuming and annoying. Talking becomes over done. Faces get old. I just want some time where I can refresh. Where I don't have to talk to my roommates about their day. Where I don't have to listen to a professor for three hours a week, because its getting hard to concentrate and the material is starting to merge together. Not connect and make sense but more like mixing two different colored paints that are not complementary and getting black. My mind is a black hole, an abbess of academia. Save me! I'm a nerd and proud of it. I love school, I really do. But the nerd in side me is really starting to loath itself. I get like this at the end of every quarter. I  get burned out by studying and research and papers. I get tired of the same routine of class, studying, practice/work out, and finding a time to eat or sleep. I'm just ready for a change of scenery, a change of pace, and change of mind set! So sit back, relax, and try to breath! I can do this, I can finish this year with my sanity in check, right? I mean, I didn't enter this place completely sane but I can at least leave here with the same corks that makes me, me...right? I'm crazy enough, I do not need school to help in that department!!!

Love,
S.O.S. (Save Our Sanity)

P.S. Its weird and even more insight into the fact that I'm a nerd. I'm a bandie, I'm a member of the UC Color Guard and find band music calming basically because its a constant. The music, the notes, the measures, its within grasp if you can read music or even listen to it. So as I sit in McMicken the Alma Mater starts to ring, and I find myself singing along. I love this place and even in time of choas it sets my mind at ease.